Whither Webcomics?

"It's my sincere belief that in ten years entire cottage industries will exist that do nothing but analyze the psychology behind horrible webcomics."
Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons, Something Awful, February 2, 2004

"Hey, why wait ten years?"
Mayerson, March 20, 2004

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09/29/2004 Entry: "Friendly Hostility August/September 2004"

Friendly Hostility

The story so far:

Okay, Fox and Collin live together and Fox plays PacMan. They must still be in college because they need money for books and Fox is a slob. So, because they need money for books, Collin decides to cheat at cards to get it. Luckily, he finds a total sucker for the game. Because said sucker can't pay up, he offers Collin his sister as payment. Collin decides to make her his slave. Her brother announces that he lost his sister at cards during a family dinner. She delivers herself to Collin and asks him to ravish her, he declines. Instead, he re-names her Bootsie and tell her she has six months of slavery ahead of her. Bootsie again asks him to ravish her. Collin introduces Fox to his slave. Fox gives her a ride home. The next day, someone at her high school throws a cupcake at her. Later that day or another day entirely, Collin makes Bootsie do eBay with him. Fox gets a call from his father and then has another call from his mother. Bootsie brags about being injured by a dust bunny while cleaning up after Fox and Collin.

Well, o-kay, I guess. Tune in next month when there might be something to write about this strip. Reading this strip is almost on par with eating raw tofu, except without the taste or nutritional value.

I've stopped reading the Live Journal. I want to maintain the purity of my experience.

Oh, I've added an announcement list if you'd like to know when this site updates. Depending on life, production, Keen, and whatnot, I think it's going to update around the first of every month, but I'm not 100% sure about that. Hence the announcement list.

In other news:

1) The Turlock Journal makes a deal with Keenspot for a print page of webcomics!!! I'm not making this up. Due to the costs of syndicated comics and the fact that the TJ was going from daily to bi-weekly, their very clever and webcomics-loving Managing Editor, Mr. Brandon Bowers, contacted Keenspot about doing a page of free (to the TJ) webcomics. Keenspot lays out the page with the comics they feel are worthy, or best represent their stable, or the ones they publish books on, or some other reason entirely and sends it to the TJ, which runs it on Wednesdays and Saturdays, and voilà! An offline audience for Keenspot comics. Brandon Bowers is a genius.

It's a nice looking, if busy and somewhat fussy, 11"-ishx18"-ish page. Here's the roster for today's paper: Abby's Agency; Funny Farm; Lost & Found; Superosity (by Chris Crosby of the Keen Empire); Greystone Inn (already print published by Plan 9); Rommies!; Melonpool; Nukees (by Darren Bleuel also of the Keen Empire and getting a PhD in Physics at UC Berkeley [I think]); Newshounds (already print published by Plan 9); Sebo; Hound's Home; Ugly Hill; You Darn Kid; Odd Numbers (Hey, I liiiiked this one!); and Rumblestrip. ("Count Your Sheep," mentioned in the article, was on the Saturday page, but got bumped for some reason on Wednesday.) Forty percent of these strips had talking animals; twenty percent had a woman in it; twenty-six percent had a child in it; sixty percent were about guys (as far as I could tell, they were guys), and zero percent had elves, dragons, or homosexuals. This is, I think, a pretty good representation of Keenspot comics. (Last time I checked on Keenspace [Keenspot's little sister], elves, dragons, and homosexuals were in the majority.)

Only "Odd Numbers" and "Roomies!" made me chuckle; only "Rumblestrip" made me groan; the rest just made me go "huh". But, you know, even I have to admit it's not a bad showing for part-time sequential artists who are doing it more for love than money. Even I can respect that. Yes, they lack the clarity of line and punchy narrative of syndicated comics, but they're not syndicated comics, so I must let them live. And, if I read the Turlock Journal on a regular basis, some of these comics would grow on me. When I used to read comics in newspapers, I'd read the whole page, otherwise I'd never have known how cool "Rose is Rose", "9 Chickwood Lane" and "Foxtrot" were and would still only be reading "Doonesbury" and "Boondocks". So, right there is an argument for webcomics in newspapers! But, I suppose, if they're in newspapers, they're no longer webcomics, eh? (EDIT100504: Click here for more on this story.)

Note: I cannot fail to notice that a certain Keenspot product is not on this page. Perhaps the divine mercy of the good Lord is going to spare the good people of Turlock a little longer. Heh heh heh.

2) Here's a big thank you to Little Miss Napoleon Herself. Thanks for the link back, you little rascal, I return the favor. I love this kind of group worship, it makes me so happy. Ah! To be the object of so much lucubration! I mean, here these kids are reading and writing about me when they could be out, I dunno, interacting with real people, making art, looking at beautiful things, drag racing, frottage, whatever computer-less kids do these days, and yet here they're lavishing the end of their childhoods on me. It makes it all even more worthwhile and gives me the strength to carry on. And so I say to you, you little Live Journal Jockeys, like John Wayne says to that poor, freaked out kid at the end of the Green Berets: "You're what this is all about."

3) Oh, and, run, don't walk, to see "Ghost in the Shell II: Innocence". I've seen it twice this week and am rendered speechless (for a change) by its beauty and messages. It transcends all this bullshit and no one ever has to know I recommended it to you. Just. Go. See. It. A.S.A.P. You'll be glad you did!